You awake to find yourself on a bed in a white room. You don't know how you got here. The last thing you remember, you fell asleep on your sofa at home in London.
Your mobile phone is next to you. You grab it. It won't turn on.
[[OK|Medical Bay 2nd]]
A gleaming white corridor. The door North to the Medical Bay will not reopen.
You can go South to the [[Chief Medical Officer's Office]], or proceed West along the corridor to the [[Life Science Corridor]], or East along the corridor to the [[Supply Corridor]].The CMO is sitting in her office, facing the door where you enter. She is a fair-skinned woman with red hair.
"You are looking a little pale", she says. "Perhaps you have teleport sickness?" You nod. You are feeling a little queasy.
She gestures to a small bottle of pills on her desk. "Eat a medicine to feel better.", she grins.
You can [[take a pill|CMO Office Death]] or return through the North door to the [[Medical Corridor]].Another gleaming white corridor.
West is a door to the [[Chief of Life Science's Office]]. To the East is a door to the [[Life Science Lab]].
To the North, the corridor curves around to the [[ER Corridor]]. To the South, the corridor curves around to the [[Medical Corridor]].There is a door in the West wall to the [[Medical Supply Room]], and a door East to the [[Janitorial Closet]].
The corridor continues South to the [[Medical Corridor]], and North to the [[ER Corridor]].The pill was poisoned! It's a fast-acting alien poison, and you die within seconds, very painfully.
"'Eat a medicine?'", you think to yourself. "No, it should be 'take some medicine', or 'take a pill'!"
Thank you for playing!A tall man with glasses in a white lab coat sits at the desk across from you.
"Can I help you?", he asks. You cannot think of a good response.
He frowns, and says in a low voice: "Listen, if you want to get off this ship, you need to get to the teleporter bay on Deck 7. That's the deck just below this one."
"But you'll also need a code for the teleporter. Don't use it without a code, or it'll teleport you into the middle of nowhere! I don't have a teleporter code, sorry."
You can leave his office back to the [[East|Life Science Corridor]].There is a door to the North marked [[Turbolift|Turbolift, Deck 6]], and a door to the South marked [[Emergency Room]].
The corridor continues West to the [[Life Science Corridor]] and East to the [[Supply Corridor]].A gleaming white room with many containers and test tubes.
"Hullo there", an overweight gentleman wearing a lab coat calls to you from the far side of the lab.
He walks over to you.
"Would you like to charge your handphone?", he asks. "Maybe then you can communicate with someone."
He gestures to a low table with a green mat on it. "That's a charging pad.", he says. "It will charge any device. It scans devices to know how fast it can safely charge them."
You can [[Charge your phone on the mat|Life Science Lab death]] or exit West to the [[Life Science Corridor]].A large, dark room containing many shelves full of boxes.
(unless: $inv contains "Pound coin")[\
You see a pound coin on the floor. You take it.
(set: $inv to $inv + (a: "Pound coin"))
]\
You may return East to the [[Supply Corridor]].A dimly-lit room with futuristic-looking cleaning equipment.
A drone hovers towards you and beeps a few times. Then it says in a robotic voice: "If you get a personal teleporter, you can probably find a code for it on Deck 1."
You can return West to the [[Supply Corridor]].You lay your phone on the green mat. It explodes instantly, killing you!
"Why did he call it a 'handphone'?", you ask yourself. "It's a 'mobile phone' in the UK, or a 'cellphone' in America."
Thank you for playing!A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 6, for Medical".
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
You may exit the turbolift to the [[South|ER Corridor]].There are a few rows of beds. A holographic man suddenly appears with a shimmer and a buzz.
"I'm the Emergency Medical Hologram.", he announces. "Please state the nature of the medical emergency."
You remain silent. After a moment he walks over to you and says in a low voice: "Listen, some spies in London have hacked my program to help you. They say that you should take the turbolift to Deck 0. That's not a real deck, but instead it will spit the turbolift out of the bottom of the ship. If you do it soon, you will land in the Atlantic Ocean, where we can rescue you. The gravity plating in the turbolift will stop you from getting hurt."
"I will disappear now. Fighting!" he says, then fades away.
You can return North to the [[ER Corridor]].A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 1, for the Bridge".
(if: $inv contains "Red keycard")[\
The computer voice says "Red keycard detected. Deck 1 access granted." The door opens.
]\
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
(if: $inv contains "Red keycard")[\
You may exit the turbolift to the South, to the [[Meeting Room Corridor]].
]\
(else:)[\
The door South out of the Turbolift, will not open.
The computer voice says "A red keycard is required to access this deck."
]A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 2, for Officers' Quarters".
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
The door South out of the Turbolift, will not open.
The computer voice says "A gold keycard is required to access this deck."A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 3, for Crew Quarters".
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
The door South out of the Turbolift, will not open.
The computer voice says "A silver keycard is required to access this deck."A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 4, for Physical Sciences and Stellar Cartography".
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
The door South out of the Turbolift, will not open.
The computer voice says "A blue keycard is required to access this deck."A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 5, for Engineering and Armory".
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
The door South out of the Turbolift, will not open.
The computer voice says "A yellow keycard is required to access this deck."A small cylindrical room with a number pad on the wall, next to the door.
A female computer voice says "Deck 7, for the Shuttle Bay".
Do you want to press something on the number pad?
[[1|Turbolift, Deck 1]]
[[2|Turbolift, Deck 2]]
[[3|Turbolift, Deck 3]]
[[4|Turbolift, Deck 4]]
[[5|Turbolift, Deck 5]]
[[6|Turbolift, Deck 6]]
[[7|Turbolift, Deck 7]]
(The 8 and 9 keys are missing)
[[0|Turbolift space death]]
You may exit the turbolift to the [[South|Teleport Corridor]].The turbolift shoots you out into space. The walls break off, and you freeze to death in the vacuum of space.
"Why did I listen to that hologram?", you ask yourself. "'Fighting!' to cheer someone on, is Konglish!"
Thank you for playing!You can go North to the [[Turbolift|Turbolift, Deck 7]] or South to the [[Teleport Room]].
You can also continue along the corridor West to get to the [[Gadget Corridor]], or East to the [[Cargo Corridor]].A kindly Irishman is standing at a control panel facing what look to be the teleporters.
"I'm sorry," he says. "The big teleporters are offline right now. You can probably find a personal teleporter in the Gadget Room though. Make sure not to use a grey one!"
You can return North to the [[Teleport Corridor]].You can go East to the [[Gadget Room]], or West to the [[Bathroom]].
You may also continue along the corridor South to the [[Shuttle Bay Corridor]], or North to the [[Teleport Corridor]].You can go West to the [[Drinking Fountain]] or East to the [[Cargo Bay]].
You can also continue along the corridor North to the [[Teleport Corridor]] or South to the [[Shuttle Bay Corridor]].There are many small machines on shelves and tables in this room, making all kinds of noises.
(unless: $inv contains "White device")[\
There are two things that look like the personal teleporter you saw Lionel using. There is a white device and a grey device. You take them both.
(set: $inv to $inv + (a: "White device", "Grey device"))
]\
You can return West to the [[Gadget Corridor]].The door is locked. You can't get in.
You hear an old man's voice from inside: "Listen, there is something you need on the shuttle that's in the Shuttle Bay, but don't try to fly the shuttle, or the big ship we're on now will shoot you down!"
You can step back East to the [[Gadget Corridor]].You can go North to the [[Shuttle Bay Control Room]] or South to the [[Shuttle Bay]].
You can also continue around the corridor East to the [[Cargo Corridor]] or West to the [[Gadget Corridor]].A drinking fountain that spouts greenish water as soon as you approached. There is a sign on it saying "Have a drink! It's good for the health."
You can [[Take a drink|Drinking Fountain death]] or return to the [[Cargo Corridor]].A very large area with many boxes and a forklift truck robot roaming around. It notices you and drives over to you.
"Hello Sir.", says the forklift. "There is a personal teleporter on one of the shelves just next to you. Can I give you a lift up to it?"
You can go Up to the [[Top Shelf of the Cargo Bay]] or return West to the [[Cargo Corridor]]."Good for the health"? That's Konglish! It should be "Good for your health".
Your insides liquify and you die a painful death.
Thanks for playing!You stand on one of the forks of the forklift truck, and it slowly lifts you up.
"You need to lose your weight!" says the forklift as it lifts you.
You get to the top shelf and look around.
"Well there it is, that big yellow thing right there. It's a little too big and heavy to carry so you can either press the button on it to use it right now, or I'll take you back down."
You can [[press the button on the yellow device|Cargo Bay yellow device death]] or go down back to the [[Cargo Bay Ground]].The device electrocutes you! You die a painful death.
"You need to lose your weight"? It should just be "You need to lose weight"!
Thanks for playing!A very large area with many boxes and a forklift truck robot roaming around.
You can go back Up to the [[Top Shelf of the Cargo Bay]] or return West to the [[Cargo Corridor]].A tall, slim, dark-skinned woman with glasses and her hair in a bob is sitting at a control console and looking at many screens.
She doesn't notice you. You clear your throat, then she glances over.
"Sorry," she says, "I was drunken last night." She flicks some switches on the control console.
"You can fly the shuttle out of here." she says. "I will scramble the sensors of this ship so it won't detect you."
You can return South to the [[Shuttle Bay Corridor]].A large hall that has a huge door open into space. There must be a forcefield covering the space door.
There is a Shuttle here. You can board the [[Shuttle]], or return North to the [[Shuttle Bay Corridor]].This is a small ship designed for short trips to nearby planets.
There is just one button: It is big and green and has LAUNCH written on it.
(unless: $inv contains "Red keycard")[\
There is also a red keycard on a shelf. You take it.
(set: $inv to $inv + (a: "Red keycard"))
]\
You can [[press the LAUNCH button|launch shuttle death]] or [[get off the shuttle|Shuttle Bay]].You press the green button. The shuttle launches and flies out of the space door, with you aboard.
It flies towards Earth, but then the big ship that you were on starts shooting at you!
Your shuttle explodes. You die in the vacuum of space.
"I was drunken last night"? No!
"Drunken" is a word only police officers use. It should just be "drunk".
Thanks for playing!You can go South to the [[Meeting Room]], or back North to the [[Turbolift|Turbolift, Deck 1]].
You can also continue around the corridor. East is the [[Break Room Corridor]] and West is the [[Captain's Corridor]].A conference room with many chairs around a big oval table.
There is a whiteboard on the far wall. It is empty except for some small text with drawings in the bottom right.
It says:
(triangle symbol) = 3
(square symbol) = 4
(hexagon symbol) = 6
You can return North to the [[Meeting Room Corridor]].You can go East to the [[Break Room]] or West to the [[Bridge Crew Locker Area]].
You can also continue along the corridor South to the [[Bridge Corridor]] or North to the [[Meeting Room Corridor]].A very clean and sparkling, white and well-lit corridor.
To the East is a door which is labelled as the [[Captain's Office]]. There is also a smaller sign that says "Cpt. Gallant". To the West is the [[Captain's Dining Room]].
You can continue along the corridor, North to the [[Meeting Room Corridor]], or South to the [[Bridge Corridor]].A cafeteria with many tables and chairs. There is a vending machine on the wall next to you.
A man in military-style uniform, wearing sunglasses, is sitting in the far corner. You can [[talk to him|Talk to Daniels]].
You can look at the [[Vending Machine]] or return West to the [[Break Room Corridor]].There are many lockers here, none of them locked. Most of them are unlabelled, but some of them have labels with names on them:
- [[A. Cobalt|ACobaltLocker]]
- [[E. Rogers|ERogersLocker]]
- [[L. Hoven|LHovenLocker]]
- [[K. Gallant|KGallantLocker]]
- [[S. Daniels|SDanielsLocker]]
Click on a name to open that locker, or return East to the [[Break Room Corridor]].
{
(set: $entry to "" )
(replace: ?entry)[****]
}You can go South to the [[Bridge]], or North to the [[Chillax Room]].
You can also continue along the corridor East to the [[Captain's Corridor]] or West to the [[Break Room Corridor]].A busy area with many officers working. They seem to be ignoring your presence.
At the far wall is a large viewscreen, showing space and the Earth.
There are many control consoles, most of them facing the viewscreen.
A short Black woman at a console next to you whispers to you: "I'm Lieutenant Erika Rogers. Check my locker, and you'll find a code to use with a teleporter. The code will set the teleport destination to London."
There are no lockers here. You can return South to the [[Bridge Corridor]].A dark room with some coloured lights moving around on the walls. Soft jazz music is playing.
A hippy-looking man is here. He is wearing sunglasses and has long, unkept blond hair.
"What's up, dude?" asks the man. "I'm Ensign Hoven. You can call me 'Lee'. I'm just a Freshman on this ship."
"It's a stressful place, the Bridge. So they built this chillout room where we can relax on our breaks. It's a high oxygen area, man."
He whispers "Check out my locker, dude. You'll find the code you need to teleport home."
You can return South to the [[Bridge Corridor]].
(if: (passage:)'s tags contains "donotshowinv")[<!--Do nothing-->]
(else-if: $inv's length is not 0)[\
You are currently carrying:
<!-- we iterate over the array and print each item -->\
(for: each _item, ...$inv)[\
_item (unless: $inv's last is _item)[, ]\
].
]It contains many British drinks and snacks, such as nuts, crisps, and drink cans.
There is a sign on it which says: "Frankly speaking, everything in this machine costs 1 pound."
(if: $inv contains "Pound coin")[\
You have a pound coin. [[Use it?|Vending Machine death]]
]\
(else:)[\
You don't have a coin...
]
You can step back to the [[Break Room]]."Frankly speaking"? You can't use that for such mild information. It must have been Konglish!
You insert the coin, and the vending machine pauses for a moment, then starts rumbling. You step back, and it fires all of its drink cans at you, one after the other! They hit you in the head and cause a concussion. You fall over.
Then the machine fires all its crisp and nuts packets at you. They bury your head while you are on the floor, and you suffocate.
Thanks for playing!You knock on the door, and the Captain shouts "Come in!".
You go in, and you see the captain sitting at a mahogony desk facing you. An aquarium with some interesting alien fish is on his right, and some metal models of spaceships are on his left.
"Good to see you, George.", he says. "I'm glad you made it this far, but we need to get you off this ship before it leaves Earth. Do you have a personal teleporter? You can find a code for it in my locker."
He adds: "It will take you to France, but I suppose that's better than being lost in space! The thought of a human stuck on this starship when it leaves Earth, gives me chicken skin!"
You nod and say thanks.
You can return West to the [[Captain's Corridor]].An extravagent dining room with a wooden table in the centre.
An overweight man wearing a chef's hat is setting the table.
He winks at you and says "I'm the Head Chef on this ship. Aaron Cobalt."
He puts down his trays on this table and comes over to you. He grabs your hand and pulls you closer to whisper in your ear.
"Listen," he whispers. "I'm actually a human, just like you." I was stuck on this ship 10 years ago when it left Earth. It's not so bad here really. I told them who I was. They like having authentic Earth food from a real Earth chef."
"From one human to another," he continues, "I don't think you really need to leave. But if you want to, you can check out my locker, on the other side of this deck. It has in it teleport coordinates that can direct you to my home in Italy."
He gives you a fist bump as you leave and winks again. "Just some skinship between humans!", he chuckles.
You can return East to the [[Captain's Corridor]].He spits on his right hand, then uses that hand to grab your hand and give you a firm handshake.
He announces proudly: "The name's Daniels. Liutenant Sam Daniels! I'm the best pilot on this ship."
He gestures to the medals on his uniform "Over 200 commendations!", he boasts. You nod.
"If you're here, you must have got the keycard from my shuttle.". You nod again.
"I'm glad you took off my shuttle and came here, or the Weapons Officer on the Bridge would have shot you down!"
"If you want to teleport off this ship, you can find some destination coordinates in my locker. I forget where on Earth they'll take you, but I guess you'll be glad just to get off this ship!"
You can step back to the [[Break Room]].Enter the four-digit combination
<div class="entry">[****]<entry|</div>
<table>
<tr>
<td>(link-repeat: "1")[(display: "NumberOne")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "2")[(display: "NumberTwo")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "3")[(display: "NumberThree")]</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>(link-repeat: "4")[(display: "NumberFour")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "5")[(display: "NumberFive")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "6")[(display: "NumberSix")]</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>(link-repeat: "7")[(display: "NumberSeven")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "8")[(display: "NumberEight")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "9")[(display: "NumberNine")]</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>(link-repeat: "Clear")[(display: "Clear")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "0")[(display: "NumberZero")]</td>
<td>(link-repeat: "Enter")[(display: "Enter")]</td>
</tr>
</table>
Or you can return to the [[Bridge Crew Locker Area]].{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 2)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}
{
(set: $entry to "")
(set: $entryLength to 4)
(set: $solution to "4318")
}{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 3)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 1)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}
{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 4)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 5)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}
{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 6)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}
{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 7)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}
{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 8)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 9)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}
{
(if: $entry's length < $entryLength)[
(set: $entered to 0)
(set: $entry to it + (text: $entered) )
(replace: ?entry)[$entry]
]
}{
(set: $entry to "" )
(replace: ?entry)[****]
}You got it right!
You materialise back where you left, in the living room of your London flat.
The TV news is talking about some strange lights in the sky, which just disappeared and seemed to fly away.
You did it! Well done. You have combatted your Konglish!
Thanks for playing!
END{
(if: $entry is $solution)[
(goto: "KeypadEnd")
]
(else:)[
(goto: "KeypadDeath")
]
}There is a code inside! Will you enter it into your white device or grey device?
The code is: square triangle 1 octagon. Write it down now, for real!
[[Use white device|Keypad]]
[[Use grey device|GreyDeviceDeath]]
Or you can step back to the [[Bridge Crew Locker Area]].The grey device teleports you into space as soon as you go to press a button on it. You die an icy death.
Thanks for playing!You are surrounded in a blue glow. The device teleports you back to Earth!
You have a great view of London, as you are miles above it. You freeze as you fall, and thankfully you are unconscious when you hit the ground in Hyde Park.
I guess that was the wrong code?
Thanks for playing.You open Sam Daniels' locker. A device inside comes to life and displays the number 3...
2...
1...
It's a bomb! The device explodes, killing you.
"I'm glad you took off my shuttle and came here"? What?
You got off the shuttle. The shuttle didn't take off!
Thanks for playing!There is a code inside! Will you enter it into your white device or grey device?
The code is: square 2 hexagon septagon. Write it down now, for real!
[[Use white device|Keypad]]
[[Use grey device|GreyDeviceDeath]]
Or you can step back to the [[Bridge Crew Locker Area]].
There is a code inside! Will you enter it into your white device or grey device?
The code is: triangle hexagon 2 0. Write it down now, for real!
[[Use white device|Keypad]]
[[Use grey device|GreyDeviceDeath]]
Or you can step back to the [[Bridge Crew Locker Area]].There is a code inside! Will you enter it into your white device or grey device?
The code is: pentagon octagon 0 nonagon. Write it down now, for real!
[[Use white device|Keypad]]
[[Use grey device|GreyDeviceDeath]]
Or you can step back to the [[Bridge Crew Locker Area]].
Konglish in Space: A Text Adventure
English edition
v0.21
by 'Stef Baton'
batonstef at gmail
[[Begin|Medical Bay]]
(set: $inv to (a:))
(set: $inv to $inv + (a: "Phone"))The door opens, and your good friend Lionel runs in. He is panicked and out of breath. He gasps "George, you're awake? We've been abducted by aliens."
"Listen", he says, "These bad aliens were big fans of K-pop and K-dramas. They got all their English from Korean popular culture. They use a lot of Konglish when they try to speak English, and they make the kind of mistakes that native speakers wouldn't make."
He continues: "There are also good aliens here. They got their English from the UK, Ireland, Canada and the US. They don't use Konglish; they use proper English, like native speakers! They have to pretend to be the bad aliens, to get by on this ship, but they won't use Konglish."
[[OK|Medical Bay 3rd]]"So, you can trust people who speak good English, but don't trust the people who speak Konglish!"
"You need to get off this ship, back to Earth. I found a personal teleporter, so I'm going now. I couldn't find another one, sorry. Good luck."
He presses a button on a white device he was carrying. He is covered in a bright blue light, and fades away. The white device is also gone.
You stand up.
You can go South through the door to the [[Medical Corridor]].